Do you ever feel like sometimes you just need to check yourself? Please tell me I’m not the only one. Every now and then I get a moment (or more, like, 20 minutes) to just think. It usually happens towards the end of the day right before bed or while I’m winding down from my workday. And no, it’s not wine-induced thoughts, although, those do happen as well. But I’ve actually been trying to not drink wine Monday-Thursday in an effort to cleanse my body a little. Trust me, it’s not fun. But back to what I was saying, sometimes I like to really step outside of myself and look at my life.
I begin to evaluate everything–where I’m going career-wise, how my relationships are doing, how my bank account is looking, my attitude, my outlook, progress in general. It can be a pretty overwhelming 20 minutes, as I can either get really stressed (shit…I should not have bought so many damn rugs this month! I need to work harder! I wish I had more time to spend with my sisters…that sort of thing), or it’s absolute contentment. I’ll be totally honest, I typically get stressed more than that great contentment feeling, but right now happens to be one of those good days.
I know I’m starting to sound a little morbid, and no, I don’t suffer from depression, but I generally think I’m a realist and reality isn’t always pretty. I like to face the facts–and my fears–and sometimes that means feeling uncomfortable with the figurative bed I’ve made.
However, right now I don’t have too many of those stomach-cringing feelings floating around. Things–work, house, health, family life, social life, etc.–are in a happy place for me. When this happens I like to document it as a reminder that better days are coming. I may not realize it in the heat of a shitty moment Monday through Thursday, but come Friday there’s wine and the weekend and it’s most likely going to be ok. So, this post serves as one of those reminders. Whatever your crappy situation / day / week / month might throw your way, know it will get better. As long as you are willing to face it and fix it, everything will be ok.