Today’s blog post is written by a guest contributor. If you’re interested in contributing to the blog, email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Hey guys! My name is Sarah McAvoy. I work as a wedding planner and write my own blog called Complicated Basic which you can check out through my Instagram. Sivan has been an inspiration of mine since I began following her in 2017, and I am beyond honored for this opportunity to be a guest contributor for her blog!
With that being said, let’s get to it…
My husband and I just had our wedding this past August, but we’ve been married for over 3 years. How is that possible, you ask? Well… we eloped!
We held a small, intimate gathering with a few of our closest friends and family in December 2018, then held a larger celebration with everyone else last year (we would have had this celebration sooner had it not been for Covid, but that’s for a whole other post). I remember worrying, at the time, that our decision to elope before our “big” day would take away from it somehow. Not sure about you, but the idea of eloping used to have a negative connotation in my mind (mostly from societal pressures to have a big, grand celebration I think), but now, especially with covid, I think more and more couples are opting for this choice as the more desirable option.
And now, having done the elopement, the more “traditional” wedding, and working as a wedding planner with couples who have chosen to go either route, I am here to tell you that I would 1000% recommend eloping. Here’s why:
+ More cost-efficient
So, you’ve gotten engaged! Congrats!! Think the costly part is over? Think again. Weddings add up QUICK. Especially these days. Sure, you can set a budget, but once you book those first few vendors you are locked in, and suddenly all the big and all the little things begin to add up.
Eloping allows you to cut costs in almost every area of your wedding, especially since your guest count will be MUCH lower. Instead of booking a huge venue with catering/bar for 100+ people, you could put that money toward a beautiful AirBnb, or find a spot out in nature you both love that you can hold your ceremony/reception in, or book a reservation at your favorite restaurant for after your ceremony! Making reservations for parties that size is MUCH easier.
Added bonus: all the money you save can go toward an epic honeymoon, or your down payment on a home, or whatever other things you dream up – the possibilities are endless.
+ Less stressful to plan
As magical a time as wedding planning is, it can also be very stressful. You start with getting the date set and the big vendors booked, and you think, “alright, we got this!” But a few months before your wedding, things begin ramping up again and there are so many small details to take care of and decisions to make that it can become overwhelming quite quickly.
With an elopement, there’s so much less of that. Less people, plus less vendors, plus less teeny-tiny details to be sorted out (like a seating chart or making sure your wedding party has their attire), equals WAY less stress.
+ Adds more reason to celebrate and takes pressure off the big day (if you choose to have one)
When my husband and I eloped, I knew I would eventually want to celebrate in a bigger, more traditional way. And, if that’s how you are too, I want you to know that eloping does not take away from how special that larger celebration is. In fact, I’d say it made it even more special for us, because not only then were we celebrating our marriage that day, but that we had made it as far as we had leading up to it (without killing each other, lol).
Plus, it took the pressure off. We were both so nervous at our bigger celebration that I honestly can’t imagine how it would feel had it also been the day we legally wed. There was a sense of acceptance toward whatever took place that day – to let go and let be – because we had already had our perfect day. No matter what went wrong, we knew that the most important day for us had already happened, and nothing could take away from that.
+ Creates space for more intimate memories to be made
It’s special to have lots of people come to your wedding to celebrate your love and this next big step in life with you, but I will say that it also leaves less time to have real conversations with most of them. It also leaves less time for eating, peeing, or relaxing of any sort.
At an elopement, you have fewer guests, and guests you’re probably much closer with anyway, which allows you to slow down and soak everything in. You’re not being pulled in a million different directions, which gives you time to sit down and have real conversations with the people you love. And, at an event like this, being able to relax and really enjoy it is everything.
Don’t get me wrong, I loved our bigger wedding and am so grateful we were finally able to make it happen. But looking back, I feel silly having ever worried that it would be any less of a meaningful celebration since we’d eloped before.
If you’re feeling like it’s the right time to take that next step in your relationship (and lives), but you’re worried about the costs and the stresses of planning a large event, consider eloping. Then, whether you decide to have that bigger celebration down the road or not, you both will have already had your perfect, memorable day with your closest people.
I hope you found this helpful and that it makes your wedding planning process less stressful in some way or another. For more tips on wedding planning and life stuff, follow and DM me on IG.