Typical Parenting Rules I Don't Subscribe To - Sivan

Typical Parenting Rules I don't subscribe to

Even before having Capri, I knew I wouldn’t be a “typical” mom. I wasn’t about to completely change my lifestyle, home decor, or travel just because there was a baby living with us. Obviously I knew there would be sacrifices and things we were happy to change with a baby in our lives, but I’ve always believed that you can parent in your own style. I’m glad to report that 1.5 years later, I feel more confident than ever and I think a large part of that is because I’m the kind of mom I want to be. No guilt associated. If you’re feeling pressure to parent a certain way, I highly suggest taking time to think about what’s actually good for you and your family – not what everyone else is doing. Here’s what I don’t subscribe to:

+ Your entire house being kid-friendly

I won’t lie and pretend that we don’t have Capri stuff everywhere because we do. There are also rooms in our house that could pass for pre-kids life. For my own sanity, I need to be able to walk into certain areas without feeling anxious about clutter. We’re fortunate to have enough space that we can somewhat contain Capri’s toys to the TV room, her room, and part of the kitchen, but we keep our bedroom zen AF and toy-free. I suggest finding at least one area of your house that can stay safe from neon rainbow plastic.

+ Oversubscribing to info

This is kind of an oxymoron because Paul is the KING of oversubscribing. So in one way, I’m very lucky that he researches like a psychopath when it comes to Capri. I also think that can be a little unhealthy and not something I want to fill my brain with 24/7. I live for the Wonderyears app which sadly just ran out on me because apparently Capri is too old. If you’re a new mom and are overloaded with info, find one source of legitimate info and one mom friend you vibe with for questions. Otherwise, it’s A LOT.

+ Mom guilt

I wrote an entire article on this so instead of going into detail, I’ll leave that here. It’s a conscious effort to not feel the guilt and I suggest reading this if you’re struggling or feeling pressure from others!

+ Limiting travel and enjoyment while traveling

We’ve brought Capri on a few trips now and have loved most of them due to one simple thing: we still live our life! We still go to nice hotels and get buzzed. We still take naps and lay on the beach. Obviously, we’re looking after Capri (unless family is with us and is helping) and are making sure she’s cared for, but you can absolutely still ‘do you’ with tweaks. Have water in between drinks, look for rooms that have a private balcony with a hot tub so you can chill while the baby naps, and look for hotels that offer cribs or other kid-friendly stuff you don’t need to worry about.

Oh and for the first trip that I totally butchered, see this post. It’s not always perfect but overall, we love traveling with our Capri Sun and so does she!

+ No screentime

Like everything, we believe in moderation with screentime. You better believe she’s watching Moana several times a week so that Paul and I can get work done or make dinner. She loves it and we spend plenty of time working on her development in other ways. I feel zero guilt here, which again, is a conscious effort.

+ Making kid-specific meals

Capri eats what we eat and because of that, she loves everything from sushi to olives. If she actually hates something, we don’t force it on her but we do expect her to try it multiple different times. For the most part, she’s eating off our plates (literally) and devouring her own.

+ Documenting a certain way

I take a million photos of Capri a day but I’m not the mom posing her with a chalkboard filled with what she likes and doesn’t at her age. At least not yet! Zero judgment to those moms though! If that’s your thing, fab; it’s just not mine. I prefer candid silly videos and photos of Capri that I’ll blackmail her with one day. For any major milestones, I write them in her baby book. This is just a reminder that just because everyone else on Instagram is doing something, you don’t have to (unless you want to!).