What I Do About The Haters - Sivan
05.29.20

What I Do About The haters

If you’ve been following for a while, you know I have an IDGAF attitude that many people seem to appreciate about me. In my opinion if you’re going to put your life on public display for the world to see you need to have thick skin, which is part of my attitude. I have always considered myself a confident person for the most part so when people insult me, I’m not one to run off and cry or be super offended. I think my attitude and thick skin go hand in hand. Once you feel comfortable in your own skin the [negative] opinions of others stop affecting you.

To be clear, it has taken years to get to this place mentally. In high school I would 100% be affected by negativity but being a Scorpio I would never show it. I’ve been known to repress my feelings because I have an issue being vulnerable. I guess you can call it tough love, but sometimes I wonder if my heart isĀ actually beating lol. My personality is so specific – hard to pinpoint – I’m not sensitive, I can handle criticism, I don’t show my feelings fully, I’m a little monotone, I’m not very touchy-feely, I don’t cry easily, and I don’t overly show my emotions. See what I mean?

I’m getting a little off topic here, but I think knowing all of this will help you understand my mindset about the “haters.” Also, I wish someone would come up with a new term for that because “haters” just sounds so pretentious. Anyway, in regards to dealing with negative comments / messages on social media, I have pretty much become numb to it. I know for a fact that no matter what I post there will be one little troll trying to rile me up. Apparently I have an abnormally large head, I’m super short (I’m 5’3″ so yeah pretty short), I’m a super bitch to my husband, I have buck teeth, I’m too insensitive, my style sucks, etc. etc. [insert aggressive eye rolling here] .

Like, not to sound arrogant by ANY means, but these are not offensive to me. I’m 32 years old, I’m a mom, I’m a wife, I’m a business owner…I have far more important things to worry about than petty comments by strangers that quite frankly are just projecting their own insecurities on me. My rule of thumb is just ignore and not engage. Engaging in an online war is exactly what the troll / hater wants. I can’t lie though, from time to time I will reply if it’s something just so absurd, misinformed, or untrue (someone tried to publicly accuse me of spending $10k on chairs and I had to let them know they cannot do math properly lol). To be honest, when I go through DMs if someone sends me a hateful message I block them. I do not even bother replying or defending myself. It’s not worth my energy or time and I do not condone that type of energy or behavior on my platforms. I have had people message me from new accounts they created just to apologize after they realize I’ve blocked them. I guess people message you with the mindset that I won’t see it??? Not entirely sure where anyone gets off feeling like sending judgey or nasty messages is okay.

Something I do want to address is deleting comments. I don’t delete negative comments, but if someone is harassing or taking it too far I simply block them. I have had negative comments made and my community actually come to my defense (thank you!!!) and then the hater deletes their comment! It’s probably a very overwhelming feeling to make a shitty little comment and then have 100’s of people coming at you. Teaches you to think twice about using your fake account simply to talk shit online!

Obviously troll accounts are created so people can speak “anonymously” but I’m just truly amazed that anyone would take the time to create a fake account for that purpose. Also, who even has extra email accounts to use for that?? It’s craziness.

Long story short, Karen12746392 can take her negative comment and shove it up her ass! Whether you’re just jealous, trying to pick a fight, have nothing better to do, etc. I hope your day gets better, you gain some self-esteem, and you delete your fake account. It’s unhealthy, creepy, and sad.

Lastly, to keep Instagram a safe place for everyone involved, I do recommend reporting any hateful, inappropriate, or harassing comments / accounts. There are Instagram tools that you can plug key words into, and basically anytime someone comments using those words Instagram is supposed to filter them out. Even though the comments don’t necessary affect me, I don’t want others who are consuming my content to be turned off by any negative comments. Also, I know many young kids are on Instagram and having a daughter myself, I’d rather do my part to eliminate as many troll accounts as possible.

I hope this article was informative and shed some light on how I feel about the haters. Out of curiosity, if you were in my position how would you handle these situations? Let me know down below in the comments.