HEY ALL, I’m so excited to be back on the blog talking to Sivan’s incredible community. Backstory: not too long ago Sivan & I swapped beauty hacks ( here & here ) & Sivan also shared her tips for living your life after having a baby. ALSO you can find some tips for turning your passion into a business here too.
But things have changed…
BIG TIME LOL.
My husband, Michael, & I welcomed our daughter Zaza Bosstick to the world in January, & it’s the best thing EVER, BUT it takes some adjusting.
Today we’re going to be discussing time management hacks for working parents so I thought it might be helpful to share our average daily schedule to really paint the picture?
It’s important for me to say this though: I’m not going to pretend to have it all together. As I’m writing this right now I’m in my silk pajamas, with unwashed, ratty hair, my eyebrows need a double tint, & I have 4 chipped pink nails. BUT !!!…….The baby is sleeping, the house is clean & I’m getting THIS post done. SO I do have a few tips & hacks up my sleeve for new parents that can help them keep it
(I’d also like to throw it out there that I’m lucky to be able to have help. A nanny a few days a week was essential because I had no maternity leave. Anyway, here are some hacks that have really worked for me while allowing me to work on my business, spend time with family, & still practice self-care).
♡ Hiring Help
As I said above, I’m very fortunate to be able to have help. For the first 4 months of Zaza’s life we had a night nurse. This really helped with sleep. My husband & I both have businesses to run so this was something that we decided to invest in. I know that this isn’t for everyone, but it really helped with our sleep & that’s where a lot of new parent stress comes from. Things are harder when you don’t have proper rest.
Now if I have to run out for any reason, I have the nanny come over for a few hours. This could mean that I’m going to a meeting, recording podcasts, or going to get a facial ( self-care is important !). When I have time to sit, concentrate & work I’m much more effective & efficient in all areas in my life.
I think a lot of parents want to or try to be with their kids all day, but that’s really hard when you don’t have a break. As I said above, taking time for yourself is VITAL. Sometimes the nanny comes over just so I can go get my nails done or go for a spray tan. There’s no shame in my game. Time to myself is KEY.
Our nanny speaks English as well as another language, & I think that’s really good for Zaza. They hang out, read books & play- Zaza loves her.
♡ Spend Money on Your Time
This kind of ties in with getting help, but spending money on my time is BIG. It always has been. Using things like Uber, Postmates, getting makeup done, & going for a blowout all free up time for me to either concentrate on work or spend QUALITY time with my daughter.
For instance, if I take an Uber I can answer emails or take a call in the back of the car opposed to driving myself. While I have my makeup done I can be on a work call or return DMs. LIKE if any of those things can buy me an extra 30 minutes with my daughter, I’m all about it.
♡ Create Space to be Present With Your Kid
I’m the type of person who doesn’t want to be half in for anything. I want to be fully in, present. When it comes to my baby, I’d rather be 100% with her when I’m with her, opposed to being distracted by my phone or work & not fully concentrating on her.
Every morning I schedule time with her. Yup. She is scheduled in my calendar. I live & die by my Google calendar ( which we’ll get to ) but this helps me be totally focussed on the time that I have with her & this block in my calendar is non-negotiable.
My husband will usually go grab her when she wakes up around 7 AM, & then he brings her into the room. We open the shades so she knows it’s time to start the day. We stay in bed & just hang out. The meditation music is playing, the fountain is on ( she loves the sound of water ), & we read books or watch Housewives (Mommy’s cartoons).
Sometimes we’ll watch a Disney movie or I do facial massage with oils (LOL), feed her, change her & we just get ready for the day. During our morning time I don’t ever pick up my phone unless it’s to turn on music or a podcast. Sometimes I’ll read a book next to her while she plays, but other than that I’m totally present.
So in saying that I’m totally present with her, I also find things to do WITH her. For instance there’s this hack that’s really been working for us that lets me get some stuff done & also fit a workout in. What I do is lay Zaza down on my yoga mat with her toys & she has tummy time. While she does this I lay next to her & do a The Skinny Confidential BODY App workout or Skype Pilates. This has been a WIN because she sees me moving my body every day so she knows what to expect. This way I’m spending time with her but also fitting in some exercise.
♡ Color-code your calendar
My color-coded calendar is something I live & die by. In fact, I’ve even hired someone to be a practitioner of my calendar. EVERYTHING is scheduled: Workouts, Zaza’s nap times, work calls, time to write & be creative, reading time, thinking time, EVEN driving time. Yes !! I DO FUCKING schedule the time it’ll take to get somewhere.
So while Zaza naps ( around 10 am ), I make myself a matcha or a iced coffee, catch up on emails, take calls, & if I’m lucky ( which I am about 4 times a week ) I squeeze in some red light therapy & Wim Hof’s breathwork finished by a freezing cold 3 minute shower. This takes 15 minutes & is so worth it because it totally sets the tone of the day & makes me a better mother.
By the time Zaza has woken up I’ve crossed some things off my to-do list, answered some emails, written out thoughts for the day & gotten some breathwork in. Sometimes I’ll take a phone call while I feed her, or I’ll put her in her weird, creepy walker she hangs out if I need to finish something up. It’s important to me that she’s an independent baby, so I make it a point not to fawn over her all day, every day. She knows we have time together in the morning & at night.
Right around now, is when the nanny would come over if needed. I’ll go do whatever I need to do, whether that’s an appointment or recording a podcast. I’ll usually get home in time to put Zaza down for her 4:30 PM nap & it gives me time to wrap up the day. Things like finishing up an Instagram post or story, having a quick sprint meeting with my team, or maybe answering a few DMs.
She usually gets up at around 5:15 PM which is when I’m present with her again because her bedtime is 7:30 PM. Sometimes we go up to the roof to hang out & play or read, or I’ll put her in this little pink puff situation where she chills if I still have to finish up some emails.
Around 6:30 PM we go downstairs & I set up her whole spa situation. LOL. I turn on music, the salt rock lamp, run a bubble bath, dim the lights, & just make her whole bathtime very zen. We just completely focus on her with massage & playtime & it gets her really sleepy.
She’ll usually want to eat after her bath so I feed her in my bed & sometimes she falls asleep on me- which I’m OBSESSED with. It’s the best. We snuggle for a little bit before I put her in her crib.
Usually around 8-10 PM I’ll have something to eat, clean the house, work on my phone, listen to a book, have a cocktail ( because !!!), hang with my husband & just relax.
So basically, all of that is in my calendar. Does the day always go to plan, down to the minute? No fucking way. But at least it’s all laid out so I can see what I’m aiming for. My calendar is so gnarly & dialed in but it creates space for me. It helps me relax when I have my time with my daughter. I know that that time is blocked so it helps me relax & enjoy time with her, without thinking about other things that are going on. I know that time is there for her.
♡ Choose an amazing partner
My husband, Michael, is really hands on. He picks up a lot of the parenting workload which I’ve heard from other mothers isn’t always the case. He has no qualms about doing whatever needs to be done to help the baby. No matter what. He reminds me of Miss Clavel from Madeline- he hops out of bed the second Zaza cries- which is amazing for me & my beauty sleep. HA !
When you’re looking for a partner or someone to have kids with, you aren’t settling. Don’t settle for anything but the best. I knew I wanted someone who would be a hands on dad. I’m a dominant entrepreneur & I always knew I’d want to keep that going. Michael has always understood this & supports that I don’t want my identity lost. If he wasn’t the kind of person that he is, we’d most likely have problems in our relationship.
I’m not trying to be Supermom here, I’m just trying to be as productive & present as possible. I’m sure this will change as she gets older, but this is just what works for us right now so I thought I’d share. I heard that when kids get older & start walking it’s a real clusterfuck. Anyway we’ll see how that goes.
I hope you guys enjoyed these little tips for mommyhood, or parenthood I should say. I must admit, I was not the most maternal person, so having Zaza really is a whole new chapter. It’s been fun to navigate because I had no idea what to expect & didn’t read any books. My advice would be to use your intuition as a guide. These things might not work for everyone, but they work for me & I just can’t help
but share them with you. Oversharer !!
Be sure to check out Sivan’s posts on The Skinny Confidential where she shares her tanning tips, how to keep your life after having a baby, & her best beauty hacks.
Until next time- x, lauryn | @theskinnyconfidential