How to Have Your sh*t together
Someone requested this topic in my FB group and I loved it. I’ve always strived to be a b*tch with my sh* together, even when it wasn’t, so I have a lot to say here. There are over-arching rules that I can think of and rules I live by my life by, but there are also more specific that help, too. I’ll do my best to sum up my thoughts without writing too much
+ SET GOALS OR INTENTIONS
I’ve been setting new year’s resolutions / goals / intentions or whatever you want to call them for years – honestly, for as long as I can remember. Not to get all Tony Robbins on you, but I think there’s major power in figuring out how you want to grow each year and milestones to help you get there. Paul and I set business and financial goals for our family, and I do the same with my team for all things on the personal side of my brand. Other than that, I set yearly personal resolutions as well. Because if you don’t have a clear vision of what you’re working towards, how are you supposed to get there?
See my resolutions for 2021, 2020 and 2019 for inspo.
+ MAINTAIN YOURSELF
If we’re talking visually having your sh*t together, a beauty maintenance routine is key. Plus, when I feel more confident, everything else seems to come easier because I’m in a better mood and feel more motivated. Even before I had shoots often and had to look decent for a living, I followed a paired down version of my own routine which I’ve shared in-depth here.
+ COMMIT
When I say I’m going to do something or will be somewhere, I show up. I’ve always found flakiness to not only be annoying, but to be one of the qualities that separate people who have their sh*t together from those who don’t.
+ FIND INSPO
Whether it’s on a more personal level or something business-related, there are people in my life (some that I know personally, some that I’ve never met) who I take notes from. Like literally. What are they doing that I admire? How can I be more like that? What habits do they seem to have and can I add those to my life? And so on. The point isn’t to copy their life or to do things that don’t feel right to you, but to have inspiration on how you want your life to be. I also love a good Pinterest mood board for visual motivation and tend to make one each year with how I want that year to look.
+ CREATE DAILY NON-NEGOTIABLES
This list doesn’t need to be long; it just needs to be consistent. I have about 5-10 things I do daily that lead to me having my sh*t together which you can read about here.
+ DON’T BE THE DRUNK B*TCH EVERY TIME
If there’s one way to get on the hot mess express, especially in your twenties when life seems to revolve around going out, it’s by over-consumption. Obviously I’ve had my fair share of drunk nights and live for them here and there, but I was never one to be the drunkest person every night out. It’s very hard to lead a productive life and have your sh*t together when you’re constantly battling a hangover or ‘WTF did I do last night?’ anxiety. Not to mention the havoc it can wreak on your bank account. Find your happy place when it comes to how many drinks you can have without having to cancel your next day, and stick to that…unless the occasion really calls for it.
+ HOLD YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE
I can’t stand people who always blame others for their problems or why their life isn’t where they want it to be. That’s a bullsh*t mentality that will only keep you stuck in the same place for life. I’m very self-aware and always try to hold myself accountable when things aren’t going the way I want them to, or when my life is a mess, and make changes from there.
+ FIRST-OF-THE-MONTH CHECKS
To start the month, here are some things I try to do, and I suggest having a similar practice to begin yours:
+ Book any health or maintenance appointments, from teeth cleaning to botox to things for the kids.
+ Take a look at my finances.
+ Check-in on goals and set any specific goals pertaining to that month.
+ Look at birthdays and holidays coming up and mark any big dates in my calendar (including when to buy presents, etc).
+ Schedule in workouts with my trainer.
+ Make a long ass list of any random things I need to get done that month and schedule things into my calendar. Pay taxes, hire someone, etc.
+ Clean out my closet and make a list of anything I need to replace. Same goes for Capri and Walker’s rooms as well.
+ GET YOUR FINANCES IN ORDER
In my twenties, I did NOT have my financial sh*t together. It took meeting Paul and LOTS of long discussions (aka lectures) and mistakes to get to a place of financial stability. I feel you if you struggle with this!!! And TBH, I think it’s part of your twenties to an extent – but that doesn’t mean you can’t get ahead early. For me, that meant getting a hold of my shopping addiction (here’s how) and following Paul’s Basic Tips for Money Management. I also broke down my tips on How to Save Money Right Now which might be helpful to read.
Anything else to add? P.S. If you liked this article, you might also be interested in HOW I GET SH*T DONE and HOW TO HAVE MORE CHILL because they kind of go hand-in-hand with having my sh*t together.